I guess, even without whoever I can still lead my life well..
=DDD

Everyday,everyday, I am afraid of receiving unknown calls,
even though I know you will stop everything of happening,
but the phobia just stay there, and never want to goes off..
Isnt this is something I knew since long ago??
However, deep inside my heart, I still hope it will never happen on me..


Am I selfish or greedy or both??
Why do I have the rights to tell everyone,
'eh, I decided to wait for him.. waiting for him to turn back his head??'
Whereas, my actions are showing my unfaithfulness??


It seems hard for me to justify your every intention,
or maybe, I didnt work hard enough to see through your intentions??
Just simply wanted you to follow my way,
the way I think is best for the both of us,
however, you didnt think the same, right??

And my motivate is just ignore your every intention,
simply dump everything back ahead, lead my own life..
A life that without your participation,
but I still lead it well or maybe better than before..

Seriously, I dun believe in everlasting or never ending,
maybe that exist, but it isnt time for me to meet it yet,
so for now, I only believe on my own..
I decided to wait, because I dun want to leave any regrets,
not saying I believe on it..

Outsiders cant see how tough the both of us actually endured,
they only see the outcome of our story,
just waiting to see a happy ending..
However, we as the lead decided not to act anymore,
stop all our actions and leaving our story stopped at the best moment..

No one knows actually, maybe only we know..
But when we said the reasons out, no one want to believe,
they think it are all excuses!!
We shouldnt look at other's face to lead our life??
I know, we know, but it is a matter of trust and time..

My heart is also bleeding,
you never know, I never want to say..
So for once, I posted out here, for you and me to see..
Do you really think I harden my heart and couldnt see your pain??
If you or everyone will to think in this way, then let it be..
Just treat me as a vixen and get over this matter,
my conscience is clear enough for my entire life,
if there is someone I need to feel sorry for, is the other girl,
the most innocent one..

OK..
All this started and ended within these few days,
I just hope it really can stop and never will continue again..